As if we have nothing..

I know I posted that we'd be headed to Swaziland today, but the team we are following there missed their flights from America, pushing them back to arrive today.. which pushes us back to leaving for Swazi to tomorrow... 4am tomorrow! YUCK!



But nonetheless, we are SWAZI-BOUND! I can hardly stand it.. I'm so ready!



I don't know what it was about Swazi that made my heart go nuts. Maybe it was the bloated-belly orphans that walked the streets in bare feet. Maybe it was the Go-Go's who juggled the pales of water on their head while carrying 30-pounds of infant on their back. Maybe it was the church services that made us feel like we just got done working out. Maybe it was the food.. wait, nevermind. Maybe it was the hospitals that seemed more like Mother Theresa's 'Home for the Dying' than a place of healing.. while all the while being the holding place for people with the greatest example of faith. Maybe it was the sunsets and how everyone of them seemed to out-do the last.



I dont know. Maybe it was all of those things. I think it was that I found the Lord in Swaziland. Outside of all the poverty, the killings, the stealing, the sexual and mental abuse.. I saw Jesus. He was there. I didn't take Him there.. He was already there.. He is there.



Amongst the broken and the poor is the greatest evidence of Jesus. Where the orphan sleeps, where the hungry eats, are the fingerprints of our God.

THERE IS HOPE IN THE HARD PLACES.



This must be why I fell in love and my heart has been groaning to get back.



You see at home, things are hard.. for sure. But honestly.. It's rare that I need to depend on the Lord. I know that I'll have a meal, a roof over my head. Even in my worst circumstances I am 'comfortable'. I don't find myself praying daily, hourly, by the minute, even, that the Lord will give me food and shelter. I don't have to believe that the Lord will protect me from death or rape because I'm not really afraid of that. I want to be dependent on the Lord like these people. I have to be. He commands that I be.



Lord help me.



This is cliche I know. Everyone who ever goes on a mission trip comes back with stories like this. If you are a part of a church, you hear this post outreach "change of perspective" testimony often. It's almost dull to us. But this is life and this is truth. WE MUST LEAN HARD INTO THE LORD AND TRUST HIM AS IF WE HAVE NOTHING.



Lord, come break the chains that hold everything distracting me from you. Make me like Job. Strip me of my security.. You are my safe place, my only safe place. You are the giver of every good thing and you promise that in surrender you bless... Release my of the need for things and show me daily that I don't deserve or need them to know you. Thank you for the things I take for granted but.. Lord, I want to want only you.





So I'm off to learn again what it means to believe God for who He says He is.. maybe it will stick this time.. :) More soon..


Lee






**side note: I've recieved a lot of emails asking about how you guys could support me in ministry. Because of the situation with the car (Theresa's car is not in working condition and after weeks of waiting we have decided to rent a car to get us to Swaziland), we've run into a lot of extra costs. We have the finances covered, but its hard to give to the people around us when our money is being sucked up by other things. We know we're supposed to be in Swazi so we are confident that the Lord will provide. So, if that was you who emailed me, I'm sorry I haven't replied but that is how you can help tangibly. Email me and let me know if you feel led to give in this way and I'll give you the information :). AND ... KNOW that we ALWAYS seek prayer support.. ALWAYS. Thanks for being so generous in giving to us. We are forever indebted to you!!