a beautiful turn-around.

this day turned out to be much more than i expected. let me explain.


so i wake up this morning at 7:14. what? no FAIR! i went to bed at 1:00, so tired that I could barely keep my head up. I didn't have class until 11, so needless to say.. i couldn't WAIT to sleep in! But, God has a funny way of getting my attention. I woke up very anxious.. I think my heart was racing like 900 miles per hour (that could have been because my roommates and I watched "The Fog" last night.. umm AWFUL!).
The first thought that crossed my mind was how I needed a job. I need one bad. All I could do was think about how I'll soon have no money and that by the time I'll finally be able to get one, I'll be almost ready to leave for my summer stuff. My thoughts were NOT "Jesus, thank you for another day" but were "J-O-B? I need one! Maybe I'll get the one at Cafe Barista? but no, i dont have the right hours? maybe i should get up right now and go look... AHH! I'll NEVER BE ABLE TO find one!"
I started out so stressed. I dont know why this particular morning had me stressed about a job instead of the other many things I have going on, but that was the deal. I finally got myself calmed down.... No wait, He finally got me calmed down. It was like this cloud of promise came around me and I was at peace. I felt God whispering that He was faithful and that I needed to trust Him with my worries. It was much sweeter than it probably sounds on a "blog", and I can't really express to you how delicately, yet powerfully He spoke to me. It was one of the sweetest times I've had with Him lately. Thank you, Jesus!
So.. on top of waking up all jittery and anxious, I felt AWFUL... how could this be? Ya'll, i felt perfect last night! I was bee-bopping around like it was NO THING! But, all of my roomies have been sick so I figured I had finally come in contact with all the nasty germs in our apartment that I have been desperately trying to avoid. My back was KILLING me, my nose was pouring (im sorry!) and my eyes would not stop watering or itching. I was muchos frustratedos. ugh!
But.. like I said, His peace came to me and calmed my anxious, sick little soul. I got out of bed, made my way to class, for what I expected to be super bad. why you ask? I was supposed to give a speech.. how can you do that with watery eyes and runny nose. Im not sure? Well yes I am. God. I'm SURE He spoke through me. I got up there, started talking about my family.. and He just took over. I hardly remember being up there, much less speaking. But what I do know, is that I started speaking boldly about Him. about the gospel. about ways that He has blessed me and shaped me into who I am today. let me interject that I LOVE one-on-one Jesus talks. I could sit at a coffeeshop and talk scripture and God's grace with you until we were both doubling over.. BUT, I rarely ever get to, or even want to share when I'm in big groups... in a church setting maybe, but at work, in a meeting, at school? no thanks pal.
Well, I did. today. In front of my entire class. Our speech was supposed to be about us, our family, things we love to do, or even things we are involved with on campus. Well, He is all of those things. He is my family. He is the thing I love to be with. everything Im involved with is because of Him. I am who I am because of Him. and He spoke that clearly through me today.
A bunch before me, and lots after me shared of how "God is my first priority" or "my faith is the most important thing in my life" and "when I got in my car accident, it changed my life and I owe it all to God".
YALL IT WAS SO COOL. I was so encouraged by the things that were said. And to be honest, I was shocked. These people know God just as I know Him. They've experienced Him in ways that I could never imagine. I know that people at Encounter believe in Jesus. I know that people at Wesley believe in Jesus. I know that my small group believes in Jesus. I know that my accountability partner is a Christian. duh. of course they are. they go to "encounter every week", i see them "at church ever Sunday and Wednesday". BLAH. that is getting overly sickening to me. Its not about that. NOT AT ALL. I didn't know these people's church attendance record. I dont know how many verses of Scripture they have memorized or how many John Piper books they've read. I FORGOT ALL THAT. i got to see How he had LITERALLY moved in their hearts. That's what it's all about. thats what He is all about.
these people shared of hard times, of great loss. Most of their speeches proclaimed times when God's grace had become most real to them.
---wait, let me butt in here and remind you: THIS IS AT A SECULAR UNIVERSITY... THIS IS NOT A RELIGION CLASS. --
ok, let me continue. if you are even still reading. (sorry i know its long).
but, yall.. these people were living in the Spirit and proclaiming Jesus with PRIDE AND AUTHORITY in the middle of Public Speaking 1000. umm hello? my socks were knocked off. i cant even fully explain that classroom today. wow. wow. and wow.
it just confirmed to me what God has been pressing into my heart: AUBURN IS BECOMING THE CENTER OF SOMETHING HUGE. ya'll the speakers are right. Louie is right. Matt Dean is right: He IS indeed raising up a generation of believers that exist solely to Praise Him and bring great GLORY TO HIS NAME.
God is famous on this campus.

i'm not ending my day the same way i started it. im not going to bed with anxiousness. today i learned the very core of what it meant to trust Him. I got a beautiful picture of what it looked like to be a product of His love. I will sleep with the thought of His reliability and His faithfulness. I am remembering the cloud of promise He shielded me with this morning. Im remembering His gentle, "be still". IM GOING TO BED FEELING MORE PRIDE FOR MY JESUS THAN I THINK I EVER HAVE BEFORE. My day is not ending the same way it began. It may have started out rough, but it is ending very differently. Today has been a beautiful turn-around.


Jesus, YOU STUN ME. YOU AMAZE ME. You have placed my heart in a new state of awe. I thank you for days like today. I thank you that your favor has been found in Auburn, AL. I thank you for the leaders and the prayer warriors who have been interceding and praying for these days to come to Auburn. THEY ARE HERE. You have made that ABUNDANTLY clear. Their faithful and fervent prayers are being answered and I can't believe I'm part of it. You are stretching my heart farther than I ever thought possible. Allow me to seek You each morning with a worry-free heart. Continue to surround me with your cloud of promises and faithfulness and instill in me the ability to be more trusting, more humble, and more obedient to what you are calling me to.. Thank you Thank you Thank you. We want more.